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I’ve always wanted to…. October 3, 2010

Posted by Ann Bertorelli in ontological coaching, Self-Development.
Tags: , , , , , ,

tangoshoesccPeterForret.jpg How often have you heard someone say, “I’ve always wanted to…” usually followed by a wistful or sad smile and a change of subject. You probably have an ‘always wanted to’ list that you periodically add to—at least I hope you do. If you don’t then your life is missing something really important.

A partial list of my ‘always wanted to’ is as follows (the part about the dominatrix costume has been left out):

  • live in Italy 
  • learn the Argentine tango
  • write a book
  • work in a bookstore
  • visit Seattle
  • go to Chautauqua New York
  • sew the perfect fitting pair of pants
  • knit a beautiful sweater
  • learn to roller skate really well
  • return to being a vegetarian
  • visit Santa Fe

I’m happy to say that I am in the process of doing a couple of items on the list, with the tango being my most recent endeavor. Now if I can just get to the point where I can say I do the tango without considering myself a big fat liar I will buy myself a pair of stiletto tango shoes..

The thing about your ‘always wanted to do’ list is that it speaks to unfulfilled but not unreachable possibilities. By giving language to these things you get closer to fulfilling dreams in your life. And achieving your dreams, even if they seem insignificant to the rest of the world makes life richer and more fulfilling. There is nothing sadder to me than the person who has no interests, no aspirations, no possibilities. I want to tell him (or her) to try very hard to get a dream and then believe that it’s possible. Believing you have no possibilities  can lead to drastic actions like jumping off bridges or the like.

When you can believe that something is possible you can begin to move toward it even though that movement may be in teeny tiny  baby steps. Then opportunities that you never expected wander into your life. But if you haven’t put language to it (sometimes known as intention—more about that another day) how the heck can you expect to find your dreams, let alone live them?

So here’s your mission should you choose to accept it

Make a list of your ‘always wanted to do.’ Include the ones that you have in fact done. Then spend some time getting cozy with the items on that list  Daydream about the joys and pleasures that will be yours when you experience some of the as yet unattained items. Then pick one to go for. Possibilities are great but without accompanying action they are a bit like window shopping at a bakery. Who the heck wants to do that?






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